Real Headlines Of 2002

[{chey}UN*REAL]

OK so I found these to be really funny



>The Years Best (Actual) Headlines of 2002
>
>1. Crack Found on Governors Daughter
>2. Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
>3. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
>4. Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
>5. Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?
>6. Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
>7. Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
>8. Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
>9. Miners Refuse to Work after Death
>10. Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
>11. War Dims Hope for Peace
>12. If Strike Isn't Se ttled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
>13. Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
>14. Enfield Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
>15. Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
>16. Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
>17. Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge
>18. New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
>19. Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
>20. Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
>21. Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
>22. Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

[outdoor]

6. Prostitutes appeal to pope

now THAT's hilarious.


hmm i wonder what's the story behind it... their next objective is to do the pope? hehe

[Zinia]

Those are funny, Chey.

[{chey}UN*REAL]

You know you are bored when .........



man I need a new job !!!!!!!




This network here is totally boring to work on.......


oh well maybe my interview today at 4 will bring forth a change in pace !!!

[SoBeiT]

"3. Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers"

would love to have seen this one

[{chey}UN*REAL]

Ahh I found more....

sorry spamming today !!!





"QUEEN MARY WILL HAVE HER BOTTOM SCRAPED"

"BOY WANTS TO MOUNT AUTOGRAPHED GUITAR"

"MOST SURGEONS FACE CUTS"

"TRAFFIC DEAD RISE SLOWLY"

"Grandmother of eight makes a hole in one"

"Deaf mute gets new hearing in killing"

"Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers"

"House passes gas tax onto senate"

"Stiff opposition expected to casket-less funeral plan"

"Two convicts evade noose, the jury hung"

"William Kelly was fed secretary"

"Milk drinkers are turning to powder"

"Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted"

"Quarter of a million Chinese live on water"

"Farmer bill dies in house"

"Iraqi head seeks arms"

"Prostitutes appeal to Pope"

"Panda mating fails - veterinarian takes over"

"NJ judge to rule on nude beach"

"Child's stool great for use in garden"

"Dr. Ruth to talk about sex with newspaper editors"

"Soviet virgin lands short of goal again"

"Organ festival ends in a smashing climax"

"Eye drops off shelf"

"Squad helps dog bite victim"

"Dealers will hear car talk at noon"

"Enraged cow injures farmer with ax"

"Lawmen from Mexico barbecue guests"

"Miners refuse to work after death"

"Two Soviet ships collide - one dies"

"Two sisters reunite after eighteen years at checkout counter"

"Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says"

"Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told"

"Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft"

"War Dims Hope for Peace"

"New Housing for Elderly Not Yet Dead"

"Deer Kill 17,000"

"Enfield Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide"

"Police Begin Campaign To Run Down Jaywalkers"

"Steals Clock, Faces Time"

"Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half"

"Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted"

"Include Your Children When Baking Cookies"

"Kids Make Nutritious Snacks"

"Teacher Strikes Idle Kids"

"If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last a While"

"British Union Finds Dwarfs In Short Supply"

"Cold Wave Linked To Temperatures"

"Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant"

"Man Eating Piranha Mistakenly Sold as Pet Fish"

"Complaints About NBA Referees Growing Ugly "

"Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case"

"Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66"

"Stolen Painting Found by Tree"

"Lansing Residents Can Drop Off Trees"

"Chou Remains Cremated"

"Hershey Bars Protest"

"Reagan Wins On Budget, But More Lies Ahead"

"Man Minus Ear Waives Hearing"

"Deaf College Opens Doors to Hearing"

"Air Head Fired"

"Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy"

"Ban on Soliciting Dead in Trotwood"

"Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead"

"Man Struck by Lightning Faces Battery Charge"

"Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire"

"Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years"

"Drunken Drivers Paid $1000 in '84"

"Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents"

"British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands"

"New Vaccine May Contain Rabies"

"Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms"

"New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group"

"Red Tape Holds up New Bridge"

"Old School Pillars are Replaced by Alumni"

"Bank Drive-in Window Blocked by Board"

"Hospitals Are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors"

"Some Pieces of Rock Hudson Sold at Auction"

"Pickups Car Most Stolen in Texas"

[Kindness]

"Farmer bill dies in house"

Poor farmer Bill, he was a good man.

[[S]uper[D]ank]

Originally posted by {chey}UN*REAL
OK so I found these to be really funny



>The Years Best (Actual) Headlines of 2002
>

>5. Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?

You need to wipe yo A$$ better, and showers do help.